I never thought I would be the parent who would need to carry my son up the stairs on my back. He is almost 13 years old and he is full of life and energy most of the time. But today, after a very active weekend, he walked to the couch and didn’t get up.
“I’m so tired, Mom. I can’t get up the stairs.”
“it’s okay, sweetie. I’ll get you. Just jump on my back.”
I wish I had a photo to post of this event. Just think about it. Mom, with neuro lyme, challenges to her nervous system and skewed balance picks up her 5′ 3″ son and carries him up the stairs. It is just what you do. . but it would have been better had I have not hit his tailbone on the doorway to his room. I hope I don’t have to get better at this. I hope this is the worst of it.
He is so tired tonight. And so wired, he can’t sleep again. And he hurts in places he didn’t before. And I know I’m not responsible. But how do I watch him–them without feeling responsible?
“But you didn’t know!” my friends tell me.
Regardless of what I knew or didn’t know, my kids are sick. And I want them to be well. If that means I carry them on my back to the ends of the earth, I will do it. Not as penance, but out of love. My mother would have done it for me.
Happy Mother’s Day to all. May you NEVER have to carry your teenager in a firefighter carry. But if you do, I hope you have the strength to carry him on the long road to wellness.